the happenings of march 21st in the year 2010

today is national astrology day.

we awoke to a stench. a stench that stank up all thangs previously unstanked in this room. WTFs ensued. the putrid odor even began to diffuse throughout the hallway.

we discovered a million-year old bag of oranges sitting on the dresser. promptly removed.

we then embarked on a journey to the wonderland that is jackson, michigan. i wore tool glasses, aka: 3D movie glasses with the 3D stuff popped out. at a red light, raven and i decided it would be perfectly acceptable to hop out of the car and go to kfc. so, we did. cherry and roxy continued on to walmart. geek-chic kids glared at raven and i with an unjustified burning hatred. not cool, geek-chic kids. not cool.

raven and i began to walk to walmart, carrying a huge-ass kfc bag that only had a box of popcorn chicken in it, but roxy and cherry picked us up in a relatively timely fashion. commence walmarting, which consists of buying things we don’t actually need and buying too much of it because it’s cheap and we convince ourselves we’re not actually spending that much. we saw jesus-lady-man, creepy sleeping homeless guy, and the guy with red shoes that reminded me of hell-boy.

when we returned to the room, the “damn festering oranges decided to leak through everything and soak [the right] side of the room in stank!” (cherry’s facebook status). the odor persisted, despite the lack of prehistoric decaying fruit. apparently, the seeping juices saturated raven’s really cute beanie cap. this is what allowed the revolting stank to persist. the beanie cap was briefly mourned. the stench was quenched. three huzzah’s for febreeze!

HUZZAH!

HUZZAH!

HUZZAH!

room 161: gateway to hell

the idea dawned on me only today to document the happenings in room 161, as a reminder to those that dwell there, and as a warning to future generations.

the cast of characters include:

roxy- self-declared “lost child.” studies leaning towards economics or management or sociology. basically she’s an indecisive snooze-fest. she’s from a minuscule town, graduating class size: 42. forty. fucking. two. high school extracurriculars included cheerleading, volley ball, ffa, teching backstage. current extracurriculars include being a cow. and a pothead.

cherry- psych major. PSYCH. just kidding, she actually is a psychology major, and dance minor. she’s a minesottan. we hate her. we can’t pronounce the name of her town. it’s like schezashuanitacomatafeck. or something. high school extracurriculars included cheerleading, dance, horse-riding, and track. current extracurriculars include you tube and facebook stalking, and colouring at 5 am with my fucking crayons. bitch.

raven- psych and communications major. i heard once that psychologists have the most problems. just saying. she’s the baby of the room, not even 18, what the hell child. she’s a sarcastic, emotional narcoleptic. frequently comatose. high school extracurriculars included theatre, choir, musicals, volley ball and soft ball. current extracurriculars include bella voce (a female a capella group) and concert choir. also kicking ass and taking names. also being a whore.

houston- this is me. vocal performance major with some sort of concentration. photography? cultural and historical studies? culinary arts? i am half neurotic mess, half six year old. also i’m pretty much the height of a six year old. high school extracurriculars included theatre, musicals, choir, and volunteering. current extracurriculars include bella voce, choir, opera workshop, photography, and being excessively obnoxious.

some fitting SUM 41 lyrics that i just found to conclude:

Don’t ask me questions cause I don’t got the answers
If you only knew what time would tell
It’s all a test and lessons that you can’t learn
You’ll know when you spend your time in hell